As you know, our very own JennaWoot is currently engaged as an aquatic assassin in the London-wide game of Street Wars. Aside from wearing disguises and quivering in fear an awful lot, nothing has changed – but things are about to get a little weird…

“Wearing homemade panda masks to cunningly conceal our identities, we headed to the secret briefing location in Hoxton – a gated club guarded by two suited men armed with super-soakers.

We were asked to state our name and purpose before being buzzed through to an outdoor waiting area. Ten minutes later two evening gowned ladies appeared and ushered us downstairs to the basement.

Pandas. They can kill.

The room was dark – lit only by candles. Two large leather recliners were positioned in front of a table with two laptops. One screen displayed a video link to the “Supreme Commander” and the other the “Mustache Commander”.


As we took a seat we were each presented with a glass of whisky from a giant bottle of Jack Daniel’s. We were handed a file containing details of our first target including a photo, phone number and both home and work address.

After a short pep talk we were released to begin our mission, the final words of the supreme commander fresh in our minds… “Stay dry and live in fear.”

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